I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
