How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize