Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
This is classic penis vs brain.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
