Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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