I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
