Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
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