sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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