the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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