so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize