If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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