I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Randomize
