Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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