Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
