just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
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