are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
