Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize