apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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