Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
