are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
