You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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