We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
