HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
