But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize