you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize