i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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