nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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