I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
