if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize