Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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