I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
