i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You've changed since you got that strap on
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
