making cat noises will not fix the situation.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
