she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
