I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
