FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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