I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
