marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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