He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
