You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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