found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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