11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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