doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
