dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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