Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
