Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
