i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
