she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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