Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
