Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
