is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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