period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
